Is Chivalry Dead?

Today’s post, brought to you by Plinky, is whether or not chivalry is dead.

I had a personal encounter with some chivalry just the other day. As I was walking up to the side door of my res hall, someone was leaving. The door had already shut behind him, but when he looked up and saw me coming to the door, he turned around, got out his ID, swiped it, and held the door open for me. I have to admit, I was impressed.

That got me thinking about the subway in New York. You know that everyone woman standing on the train is looking around at all the men seated around her angrily thinking about how rude it is that none of them are offering her a seat. But, if a man happened to think to offer her a seat, she wouldn’t take it. It’s not that she actually wants to sit down, she just wants to know that she could if she wanted. Trust me, I know this from experience.

So, is chivalry dead? I mean if holding doors and offering a seat is all chivalry is…

But, it’s not. Chivalry is about how men treat women. Take a moment and think about television and music all about alcohol, money, and men seeing women as sex objects. Seriously, listen to some of the stuff on the radio and you will be forced to conclude that chivalry is dead. Watch any episode of Jersey Shore and you’ll see Ron and Sam fighting over nothing. Ron will be yelling, “What did I do?!” and Sam will be yelling “You tell me, Ron. You tell me.” Seriously, Ron is like the epitome of un-chivalrous, but to be fair, Sam is the epitome of a psycho girlfriend.

The simple fact that I’m surprised when a guy  holds the door for me is proof enough that chivalry is a dying art.

Part II of the question is should chivalry be dead? Which is a little weird. I mean why would you want chivalry to be dead? But if you think about it, chivalry can be skewed and seen as condescending. One time on the subway, I watched this woman freak out on a guy who offered her his seat.

“No, I don’t need yo’ seat! You think because I’m a woman I can’t stand on ‘dis train? Would you offer me a seat if I was a man? No. That is sexist!”

That went on for a few minutes, and the guy was only trying to be nice! Point is, some women feel the need to prove they don’t need to be doted on, especially by a man.

I for one though, enjoy a door being held for me. Same as how I enjoy being offered a seat on the subway. Yes, I can open the door myself, and yes I could stand on the 4 train all the way home, but I’m always flattered when a guy is enough of a gentleman to act with chivalry.

Thoughts? Opinions? Is chivalry dead, should it be?


About MMM

Resolving to write in 2011!
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4 Responses to Is Chivalry Dead?

  1. It is a shame, the culture has died out a bit. Admittedly, I am prone to fits of chivalry when the present company is inspiring me towards it. It can only take a meeting of the eyes to be ‘at her service.’

    Although can be harder when certain elements of the day are providing a bit much stress, frustration, etc. Another biggie is the women who act like it is anti-feminism… they seem to be confusing sexism with modernism 🙂

    • MMM says:

      Glad to hear that chivalry isn’t dead, at least in you! Agreed….sexism and modernism do get confused too often. Thanks for reading and commenting, optomystic 🙂

  2. I often hold doors open…but not just for women, for anyone. It’s called being courteous

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